I hope the T experience transforms your crying for you.
When I was a child, I would cry and cry, but no one was ever there to comfort me. I finally learned that I cried only to comfort myself.
Now, when I cry I try to find a very private place. For me, crying feels like a weakness, because I can't control it. I don't want anyone to comfort me. The people who should have comforted me were the ones responsible for the abuse that caused the crying, so I don't know how to be comforted. I definitely don't want to cry with t-I am too guarded! Also, I get terrible headaches afterwords that last for the rest of the day and sometimes beyond. My t says I should cry as a release, but crying for me only causes more physical pain.
My point in sharing all of this, Chopin, is to let you know that you are not alone in not crying "correctly". I hope you can find a way to make crying a comfort for you. When it all works out, I will be interested to hear how you accomplished this task.
Bluemountains