hi again lmn...

I don't think anyone can properly give you an answer about your relationship because nobody knows him as well as you and even if they did predicting his response would be impossible.

Two things come to mind to think about though. First, if you are worried about causing a rift in your relationship, consider that not finding a way to tell him may make a larger rift than coming clean. He knows something is wrong, but he doesn't know exactly what, so he may perceive that as that you don't trust him and that in itself could prevent him from remaining close with you. At worst he may think that you are purposely being vague in order to give him a "hint" that you want to break up.

The second thing is that if you can't tell him because you are afraid he won't take it well, what will you do if you do end up with a future together? You will eventually have to tell him or else he will figure out there is something wrong on his own. If you can't trust to tell him now will you ever be able to trust him? I realize it is extra extra difficult because he is far away. But if you are using that as a reason not to tell him now will you just come up with another reason not to tell him if things go further?

Maybe you could find a way to tell him gently when you are together. Maybe not make a huge deal out of it. It is after all just a part of "you" it doesn't define you. The good times he spends with you are a part of "you" too.

There is a risk that he won't be able to accept it well. There is a risk of that with anyone. You will have to decide if you are willing to take that risk if and when you are ready. But also consider that if he can't deal with it might it not be better to find out now rather than later when you are even more invested?

Obviously I have an opinion on this but this is an important thing and you will have to make your own decision. I hope other people will chime in with other ideas on this so that you have a range of opinions to help you make your decision.

Good luck, I hope this works out well foryou.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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