Rhapsody . . . I felt the same distrust of men.

For me, I realized my "picker" was broken. I realized I kept surrounding myself with the wrong types of people. I'd pick mates who were substances abusers or sex addicts; this is how my picker was broken.

After I realized my picker was broken, I quit looking for mates and began working on healing for myself. I asked myself why was I drawn to doomed relationships? Also, why was I willing to give so much and get little or nothing in return? Those answers related to the nature of my sexual abuse and neglect I endured as a child.

I believe it is easier to find a healthy relationship when you are on more solid ground. That is, if that (a healthy relationship) is what you value.

Everyone has different values. I worked at finding a mate who had similar values as I did (do). I'm not going to list all the things I desired in a mate . . . but this one . . . I wanted children, a family.

One major attractive quality about my hubby is that he doesn't push me to have sexual intimacy when he senses I'm being triggered to memories of my past assaults. He can't read my mind. We had to work at effective communication to ensure my feeling of safety. He cares and respects me completely. Those are priceless values!

I'm certain you can find a mate who values what you value and cares and respects you completely. (((((((((Rhapsody))))))))