First of all, tanks to the admins for adding icon trigger.

Second, what d'you smoke, Forgive77? Cigarettes or something else?

Third, yesterday everything went wrong. The man invited to dinner had brought wife and daughter which spoke only English, that was good for me 'cause I had the opportunity to improve my English, but I said almost nothing during the entire dinner because I was jittery. At a certain point the big question arrived...
The man: "So... you've been here a short time... what about your first impression?"
Me: "Really bad."
My father in law: "No, it's not true, what you're saying isn't true!"
Me: "Yes, sorry, my first impression was pretty good, the second one was really bad."
Frost in the air.
Then they started to talk about work. How much times my husband works, how much time the other girl works, how many people would be happy to work 4 or 5 hours and on the contrary don't have a job while other people like my husband and the other girl work 10 hours, so not to exploding I suddenly went up from the chair, rushed to the toilet and started to cry, trying not to spoil my make-up.
Then I came back. I ate nothing. Just two pieces of bread.
After the guests have gone, we stayed there for a while, until my mother in law told me: "You should use a scented spray before washing his T-shirts", and me: "Why d'you say it to me? You can say it to him, too!" And her: "You stay at home...!" And me "So what?! I'm not his slave! He can wash his own clothes!", my heart was pounding but she's been a real lady because she's pretended I hadn't say anything and continued to speak calmly.
To come back home, my husband and me drove for 27 km. All the time without saying a word. The same thing at home. He went to bed and fell asleep. If there's something I hate is that he falls asleep before me. I took half sleeping pills, read, cried, wanted to run away, wanted to go out in the darkness and run away, wanted to break something, but what I did was intaking another half pill and finally falling asleep.
This morning I had a big headache. My husband woke up at 8 to go to work and I pretended to sleep. I didn't want to speak with him. He gave me a kiss before going. During the night he had hugged me, too. But when I got up from bed I sent him a really rude text and he answered that he doesn't know anymore what to do with me because everything he does he's wrong. He says "I'm sorry". I'm bad and he says "I'm sorry".
And I feel angry and lost and lonely more and more and more. And I'm sure that everything will go wrong and my husband will leave me.