A couple of thoughts. One that jumps out is that your choice of language in reference to yourself, "filthiness", suggests that maybe working on self acceptance would be helpful to you. I don't know what you are referring to as being "filthy", whether it is the original abuse you suffered from others, the fact that you experience some cognitive distortions that are related to it, or that there are several former abusers still in your life. None of these things makes you a bad person or deserving in any way of such a harsh label. Many people here, including me, could claim all three of those things as true for us, would you call us "filthy"?

Second, what you are making about your T is really about you. You are the one who made the insightful connection between the cognitive distortion and the ongoing presence of an abuser in your life. It's really you who raised the issue itself and your T that built on what you pointed out. Maybe you weren't ready to really hear what you yourself had to say, but I'm guessing that is not the case, or you wouldn't have said it.

Third, it seems to me that now you have some choices to make. If you want to change the cognitive distortion, you can re evaluate the presence of people in your life who *may* be keeping you from doing so. You can also change the way you see yourself as a part of this. This is all under your control. The only person whose thumb you are under is your own.