Hey, I might be joining you soon.
I'm not sure how to conceptualize it either. I suppose sometimes we need an extra bust to get the energy to work on our problems. I don't know about you. But, I think my problems also have a bit of a genetic component (my nephew has inherited my odd perfectionist tendencies). Also I find in my life that stress tends to trigger my greater emotional instability. If you have had a lot of stress in your life, it is reasonable to need support as you go through whatever issues that you may have. Try not to judge yourself for needing extra help. My nephew needs help to do things because he is only eight. So, we need help sometimes dealing with life's problems.
According to my books, it takes about 8 weeks to get the full effect of an anti-depressant. A client takes them for six months after all the symptoms have cleared up. I am not sure if that includes the two months to be "in remission" that the DSM-IVTR mentions. I have read of some people staying on them for a year and others having trouble getting off them.
As for "mental illness", I am not sure what that means. I have studied it in school and know the technical definition (deviance in thinking-as in the person's thinking deviants from the norm, dysfunction-it interferes with the person's functioning, distress-we are bothered by it, and the last one which I disagree with is danger). My teacher of course made sure to state that this D is not always a part of the definition.
Our society has a misunderstood view of mental illness. You and I are not crazy. Don't let some other persons' misconception of mental illness keep you from availing yourself of the resources you need. If you are like me, you have internalized our society's view of mental illness. I am not sure how to change that view to a more accepting view in relation to one's self at this point in time. But, I think that recognizing the fact that our conception is wrongly based on society's messed up views can help us to open the way to find a better view. Personally, I prefer to think of it as a mental problem rather than mental illness. Mental illness still makes me think of a person who can't do anything for him/herself. You are also not your mental problem. It is just one aspect of who you are. So, consider your other traits. What are your strengths? How would your friends and love ones describe you?
Now to see if I can teach myself all of this in prep for T appoinment next week.