i'm only alive because i'm too cowardly to die. it's easy to **** up your death. i rather live miserably healthy, than live on with the affects of my failed death and be even more miserable.

your question was "Is life a good idea - with so much suffering and pain. i dunno, to me it's what you've been raised with. silver spoon? luck? friends? looks? without them, it's just a crap ton harder. people say that it's worth living, but some can't see it yet. so hope is the only thing going for you. or the people around you, who you are bound with.

that's all i can think of.