rainbow....my XT, although not much, occasionally said things that made sense. She said we are all changing constinently as our relationships will too.... we are not meant to be stagnant beings. Sounds like she wants you to take care of you and those needs you CANT or WONT meet will need to be met by others....IE Husband? Hence the list? Just a thought , but i know with transference we can tend to ignore our RL partners etc and put all our eggs, as far as needs being met, into one basket .... the T basket....and you know what they say about putting all the eggs in the ONE basket.... my 2 cents