Rainbow, I'm responding partly because I am upset; I've spent the last two years in therapy trying to address the damage done by having a mother who couldn't be bothered to listen to my 'boring' stuff, who wanted everyone to be exactly like her and felt she had the right to know everything about everyone close to her, and who had no respect for others' boundaries. But also to try to help you see that what you're talking about and doing is not some innocuous quirk of yours that we should all support you in. You said you wanted to change. You've been through five t's and thirty years of this. If you're serious about changing then please stop fighting your t.

Yes, we're all in therapy for a reason. Yes, we all have issues we're working on. But we're WORKING on them and not moaning about how angry and hurt we are that our t's are doing what we said we wanted - helping us to change.