Rose,

Thank you so much for writing. I'm glad that we can connect on this, and when I read your post, I felt very warm and grateful that we have this space and oppportunity to do that.

One of the things about situations with unmet needs – or situations where we seem to be in un-positive or non-ideal states is also that those states too meet certain needs. Such as, when you are anxious and working for keeping things going, perhaps a need you're meeting is one for efficiency? So in that case anxiety seems to almost be a friend to you, and useful. (I didn't say your need for “perfection” because my understanding of perfection is that the term is an evaluation of what you've done – so I guess I would wonder, when you think about being perfect, what needs are being met? And when you think about not being perfect, what needs are not being met? If that makes sense...)

I can really resonate with what you're going through – and it makes a certain amount of sense now why anxiety and depression are often diagnosed in the same person... whereas they seem to be contradictory states of being...

I am too. When I read your post, I feel excited because there is so much introspection and so much focus you're giving yourself. I feel hopeful because that's something I really value and think is critical to healing. And I really congratulate you on working on out one unmet need for social interaction. I agree with OpenEyes too.. I think the need for safety can be a huge trigger for withdrawal/anxiety/depression. This business with the SSDI sounds really difficult and intimidating. I hope it works out for everyone.

Warmly, with lots of hugs to everyone
Bean