All I do is eat, drink, smoke, shag and self injure.
This loop is going to kill me.

I keep getting an urge to run away.
To pack up everthing of value (that I could sell) and leave.
And never come back.

I hate this life.

I can feel that my time might be coming soon. Not that I'd end it myself. Just an inkling that I'm getting that the world is going to be done with me shortly.

I'm just so scared.