Took 60mg of temazepam (tranquilizer like Valium) and I am improved. Started to clean up the dishes. Don't feel so paranoid about being out among people. I made two perfect mugs of tea and had raisin toast with it. That temazepam gave me some impetus.

I will go get my boyfriend's prescription at Walmart's. I feel up to driving my car now, which 2 hours ago I couldn't face. I may even put out that bird seed.

Temazepam can be very addictive, and I see that I really like it. If I overuse my supply and then run out, the withdrawal is lousy to go through. I am just so desperate to feel somewhat okay now. I doubt the doctors are going to approve of this.

I am better this evening thanks to temazepam. Maybe I'll even shower and wash my hair tonight. Then I would feel so much better.