Oh anjelmarie....I hope so much that you have not left this site already, and that possibly you may see this. Whether anything about this will matter to you right now I don't know, but I really need to try. I wish with all my heart that I could reach out and give you a huge hug right now, and tell you that whether I know you or not....I DO care, and so do others. I understand that it can add to your pain when you express so much of what you're going through, and people do not respond. (Of course that doesn't mean that they might not do so at a later time.) I was not doing well at all this morning, and posted something....so far no one has said anything, and I can't lie that I've felt a little disappointed. However....and I say this with a tremendous amount of caring....perhaps it might help you to remember that many, many people here are suffering greatly, and sometimes there's just not enough words to go around. As I imagine you know, depression can make you feel so empty that sometimes you feel like you can't even get yourself to do something that might otherwise seem so simple, like typing a response. BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT PEOPLE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU. I know one person (me) who does, and I say with total confidence that there are more. I would like to offer you my friendship, (will send a request), and send you the warmest of wishes.....