I am the epitome of harm.
i've spent all day today barely tolerating everything around me. all day. suicide's been on my mind. and i come home to a message from a friend saying that the ".." message i left never helps... she left no indication that she wanted help before that.. i didn't know she needed help at the time.. but when i read it, that was just another blow to my chest saying 'you're useless'.. and i broke down. and left a huge message about it. and she messaged me back obviously very hurt and upset by what i'd said even though i was trying to apologize through the entire thing and took the weight for every fall just like i always do..

...
i can never help anyone.
all i do is hurt people.
i have no purpose.
i'm better off dead.
i can't even help my best friend.
there's nothing in this world for me.
all i do is hurt.
i'm better-off.. everyone's better off when i'm gone.