I haven't emailed T at all this week...but tonigt I want to sooo bad...he is probably asleep anyway-but the compulsion and desire is so tough...I see him tomorrow at 5-sooo close yet so far. But when I feel like this tonight-I wonder what the point in me not reaching out at all is...I know it shouldn't be just for attention-but isn't it ok for connection? I just need to figure out how to say I need that instead of introducing "drama"...I don't know anymore : ( I want my T