It's all going to be okay, VoodooGirl! I am 50. I have 4 children, and I have bipolar II, but my medication and t visits help me to lead a pretty normal life.
I know it is all overwhelming at times, but you are open with your boyfriend, and he loves you for you. You don't know what the future holds, nor do I, nor does anyone. We just have to live one day at a time.
I have passed on bipolar, or in his case a mood disorder, to at least one of my children, but since it was caught early (he's twelve) his prognosis is good. He takes medication and visits a t as well. He is developing great coping skills. Is it fair for him to have it?-No, but those afflicted with other diseases don't get fairness either.

How are you dealing with your anxiety? It sounds like you are overwhelmed, but it doesn't have to be this way.

-Good luck from an oldtimer who's been there!

Bluemountains