((((((((rainbow_rose)))))))) I know how it is to go deeper in therapy. It's hard, but it can be worth it!

Can you do a little of the homework? Just get your toes wet with it? Do you have a chance to tell or email your T that it's too hard for you? Is she going away? Maybe she could change it so it's more bearable for you, or maybe you can even do that for yourself.

I know you don't want to share what it is here. I know you'd get support and help, but I understand how difficult that is for you.

Maybe, when T gets back, you can focus on the shame and embarrassment before you get into the "issue" itself? Like, work with reducing the shame first?

I know, for myself, I feel a lot of shame about my feelings and behavior. Lots of people feel shame but it's usually unwarranted. If something happened to you that wasn't your fault, it's not something to be ashamed of. If you did something or feel something, no matter what, it's not something to be ashamed of either. Whatever it is, can you accept it and not judge yourself any more?

Easier to say, I know! Sorry if I'm rambling too much. I'll stop. I just want to help but feel ineffective with my words. Sending you lots of hugs. That I know I can do right.