I have got better over the years, but not without almost constant working on myself and my life, interspersed with days of giving up and telling the universe "OK I'm done. It's your turn; give me something." I was painfully suicidal for many years and I'm not anymore. I used to hurt myself on purpose (burning and cutting) and I don't anymore. At one point I looked myself in the mirror and said, "I'm not going to hurt you on purpose anymore; you don't deserve that." It was hard to get to. It took me about five years after I first decided to say "I love you" to myself to get the motivation to actually do it. I was so bent on destroying any piece of me that was left.

My life isn't perfect now. I am physically ill and still have occasional relationship problems, as well as money and health issues. That's why I came here, for help with a relationship. But I don't hate myself anymore, and I don't hurt myself anymore, and I don't hate my life, and I have projects and people I care about that I love and who love me back.

I've had help, too. I remember one therapist that I got close to. I used to get so emotionally exhausted. I called him once and cried to him, "No matter how hard I try, I always get back to the same place, pushing the same boulder up the same hill." He said, "Maybe you could think of it as a cycle rather than a circle - going around and around but each time learning a little more until the highs are a little more peaceful and the lows are no longer bottomless. I didn't exactly believe it and it didn't seem that way, but it was a comforting idea. Now it's true though. I can face the feelings I couldn't face before - face the "demons" and move on.

So yes, sometimes it happens that people get better.