You seem half way there! The answer is in your questions. What, I am referring to, is knowing who you are and self acceptance. It takes time, but it is very possible. Your morality is leading you in the right direction. Listen to it.

Depending on people to a certain degree is fine. We all need friends and company. When a person becomes completely dependent on others for their happiness, it is unhealthy.

Your concerns are completely normal.

Sorry. I wish, I had an easier answer, for you. Perhaps, someone else does?