I'm going to fill in the holes here..

I got super pissed at my bf for not wanting to talk about something (he didn't want to talk about it, I did). The something wasn't very important, honestly. I blew up. Bleeeew up. Yelling, screaming.. Only threw one thing.. Hit myself a few times. I didn't blow up over him not wanting to talk, I blew up because he wouldn't physically leave my house (I wanted him out because he didn't want to talk about this subject originally). I wanted him out, he was sitting on the couch and I couldn't physically move him out.. I'm not that strong. It took me calling 911 to get him out. I hung up on 911, they called ack and sent someone pver even though i said not to. Then after talking to the cop, called bf back and got, "you just called the cops on me, you just freaked out again (I've been this mad over similar non important issues none recently though) and your not even going to apologize... I ****ing hate you!"

Slap. Okay, I love you too was my response. I called an hour later and asked him to come get me (I walked away am out and about) and talk to me. He said no, I ****ing hate you. Okay. I said I needed him, be can opt out of the relationship but this is me for the time being, I'm working on getting help, but he's either in it, or not. He said he was with his friend and leave him alone. I did.

We have been together 4 yrs. he came in my house 2 hrs later like nothing happened in front of my whole family. Now everything is normal?. Ugh. Idk bow I feel about it.

I haven't blown up in a while. Should have k ow n I would. I haven't been okay for a while now. Cop tried to force me to go to the hospital. I need help .