lately I can't seem to shake this feeling I haven't been sleep. Maybe three hrs if I'm lucky and I'm not eating I've lost 15lbs in a few short weeks. I can't stop wondering what I did wrong and why people treat me so badly. Its affecting me horribly. I have an 11 month old daughter and I want to be better for her but I can't even find energy to get out of bed each day. All my bf and I do is fight he doesn't understand how I feel and I try and try again to tell him and nothing. Ill be 25 very shortly and haven't cut since highschool but recently that's all I think about. I know I won't do it just thoughts and the thoughts I'd love to go away but they won't! Keeping me up all night long. I'm having a hard time doing anything anymore. My family lives about 500 miles away from me and all I want to do is move back but the bf won't. Its making me worse and I don't know why. I feel like I'm in hs again. I have mood swings like crazy I can't function and I eat I don't know...its sounds childish but I do know all I want it my mom. She always makes it better. I don't have ins to go to a doc I can bearly afford anything as is I make nothing. I don't know anymore. Would they be better off without me I don't know. Would everyone be happy if I disappear I don't know...I'm soo lost in everything its spinning me so fast I'm getting dizzy and I still can only ever come up with I don't know. I really wish I had someone to talk to.