I tried to post earlier, but my thought out response to you suddenly disappeared off my computer screen and wasn't in the dang thing's memory! Aaargh!

I wanted to tell you that I can understand your desire for a classification of the abuse ~ I think that's relatively common. IMO, whether the behavior falls under rape, sexual abuse, or sexual assault really doesn't matter to the victim. YOU! The only difference the title makes is the way that other people in general society reacts to the news and how people feel about your abusive ex-bf.

Rape typically brings up a very negative reaction from society. It goes down from there. Sexual abuse doesn't have as much understanding or sympathy, and sexual assault is often minimized in our society. The result of getting the opinions from others on what category the issue occurred under is likely to only bring you down.

You experienced something terrible ~ a terrible situation to find oneself in and then somehow make sense of. We aren't in the same state of mind now that we were in 20 years ago. It's tough to look at the event/s clearly. I really understand the inner dilemma you find yourself questioning why you kept going back. I did the same thing from age 13-15, so I take on a lot of personal responsibility for making foolish decisions. My T reminds me that things at home felt a lot worse to me at that time. I hoped that my uncle would leave me alone, wishing that my aunt would stay up and protect me. I loved my aunt like a best friend or a mom & and was always wanting to be with her.

It's an issue that I'm continuing to work through. I haven't gotten through it completely, but I have let go of a lot of the responsibility that I'd been holding onto for so many years.

Very best wishes to you!