Let me be the first to say, "welcome desparado!!!" , and that everyone here not only understands what you are going through, but is willing to help in any way that is possible.

I find myself stuck in that hole too; where anxiety keeps building as one loses hope in ever escaping that dark place.

It's important to realize though, that being at the bottom of the hole means the only thing left to do is climb out! It will be extremely rough, but give it everything you got...You can't "fall" any further; that's one thing you know for sure.

Try starting your journey of getting out of that hole by telling us here at the forum some things about yourself, and from there see what happens.

Thanks for finding us desparado, and know that I (as many others on this forum) always have a listening ear.