Darkeyes and Okay, thank you for your words of compassion and understanding. My daughter's soul is free but there is a circle and being bound in a vault in a box guaranteed not to leak for 50 years stops the circle. She can't be returned to the earth and grow and change as she is trapped there in that vault, in that box. Her body. When I spread the ashes of friends' gone from me now I set them back to the earth and give a prayer of continuing the circle and feeding all of us, plants, trees water etc. It hit me hard and I don't know why but I am in need of making her tree the place where I choose to have life celebrated rather then bringing life to the dead place and feeling her abandoned raisin corpse beneath the ground.