Thanks Sabrina. I survived the trip back here to residence. I blew up at my family before I left though, so they're not happy with me. I tried to talk with them, but since they continued to belittle me, it seemed like a good idea. I did stay safe, but I just can't stop feeling miserable.

Thanks Always. I did try to talk with them, but since they didn't want to listen ... yeah. I tried my best, all I can do right? I'm going to try to talk with my T, but shes going on vacation for two months and this week is my last session with her. *sighs* For the best I suppose, now I get to find someone I might "click" with better.

Thanks fayerody. I'll try to keep y'all posted, but I don't know right now...

Thanks Lexicon. I never thought about that in regards to my family. It might make some sense, but I think that my family still needs a good slapping for the stupid jokes and comments they make about others. I never thought up that idea about the journalling. Thanks, I'll try it out.

Thanks zen. My friend keeps trying to tell me that I'm worth it, but I just don't like being a bother. Even posting here makes me feel like there are other people who need support more than me. I did try to confront them, but it didn't go so well. At all, actually. I'm starting to wonder if I actually have a relationship with my family. (I always felt isolated from them, but this just 'takes the cake' so to speak) . I admit it, I do the smiling "everything is fine" thing. I just can't stop it. It seems that every time I do something goes wrong. *sighs* . I still don't think I deserve anything but I'll try.

Thanks to all of you. You've made me feel just a bit better.