Hello Nevergiveup8, I'm feeling similarly rock bottom right now.

I can totally understand the pain and everything that comes with it and also how hard it is to keep going and telling yourself that it will get better (for longer, this time).

I am moved though by what Regretful says about the way people care in these forums and how we can at least appreciate this. This is a great community. Yes, I would love to have a real, physical hug as well right now and that's not possible within the context of this community, but you can still feel moved and appreciated and understood and loved here. Caring is important and it helps.

Caring about something is also crucial for us in order to go on as Happycheeks said in other words when (s)he describes her (sorry, not sure whether you are female, Happy) love for language learning. It reminds me of my passion for reading and writing and the imagination.
Is there anything you feel really passionate about, Nevergiveup8? Try and pursue this with all your might.