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If you don't want to get beat then you must keep fighting. Are you in therapy? If you're not, can you start? Can you afford it?
If you can't afford it, can you see your doctor? He can put you on medication at least temporarily until you CAN get into therapy. I know we don't WANT to be on medication, but it does HELP!! I have to be on it cause while therapy helped, it just didn't bring me out of the 'pits'. I guess they called it 'clinical' depression. So I need it forever, darn it. Anyway, I feel "normal" -- whatever that is. I can function on an even keel without the highs & lows and I feel "good." Maybe you should try it.
Anyway please try to get some help. I wish you the very best. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee
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