Hey everyone I know I havent been real active on the board but .... I have been lurking ...Just havent felt like I had anything worth while to add ...

Possible trigger ...

I have been dealing with rapid cycling for monthsssssssssssss One minute I'm feeling "ok" the next Im "Up" then the next time I'm "down and suicidal." I pretty much feel suicidal daily ... So far I havent "made plans" or wrote any letters ... My Therapist and I agree that for now we are going to play it by ear daily ..I have his number if I need to call him if I'm on the ledge and I know when my thoughts of suicide go to far . I also saw my pdoc while I was there for a emergency appt ( my T and Pdoc are in the same office ) .. he didnt want to change any of my meds right now as I havent responded well to med changes in the past and the current medications keep the hallcinations away.

Here's my problem today .... I woke up today in a mood that I have never dealt with before. I honestly dont care about anything ... I saw my T today for our regular appt ... He assured me that my " dont care feeling" is a normal thing for bipolars to feel ... But for me its a first ... He reassured me that this mood will indeed pass like all the other feelings and moods I go thru having Bipolar ..

Im just hoping this mood passes soon .. I dislike this one more than all of the other moods I attempt to cope with on a daily basis.

Can anyone relate? Sorry if my post seems jumbled I just cant seem to make sense

Thanks