This may seem like a novel.

Back Nov.'02, I became engaged to a woman, that I thought was the woman of my dreams. At that time, she was still married, but had left her husband in Aug.'02. She had been severely abused as a child(she will be 44 in September) by her step-father(recently deceased).

Several months after getting engaged to her, I requested from the owner of the online support group my (ex)fiance was a member of, to be allowed to join the online support group for abuse survivors, in order to gain a better appreciation of what she had been through. I even started seeing a counselor at a women's center, that only worked with abuse survivors, to increase my appreciation.

At one point, I started communicating with one of the other women in the group, that had a lot of knowledge of my (ex)fiance.

Anyway, My (ex)fiance n' I only lasted until Jan.'07. But during that time, the other woman I had met, had become engaged to a U.S. Army soldier. His first tour of duty in Iraq went by without a hitch. But prior to his second tour of duty, he broke up with her, but didn't tell her why. She got hold of me via Yahoo Messenger, and told me what happened. I told her I wanted his contact info. At first she refused. I pushed and pushed, until she finally gave it to me. She didn't want me to wreck things with him, which took some time convincing her that I wouldn't. Then I contacted him. At first he got all foul-mouthed with me, even though I told him who I was. I finally got him to calm down and told him I just wanted to know why, he didn't tell her. It took some time, but I finally got him to tell me. He had a 'premonition' that, he would not survive his second tour of duty in Iraq.(sadly, That eventually came true) I asked him if he would like me to tell her, or if he would like to tell her. He did tell her.

Fast forward to 2006(prior to the breakup with my fiance). The woman I met online, had been through another disastrous relationship, prior to her getting married in 2006. Her husband turned out to be an even bigger jerk than the guy she was involved with prior to the marriage. The only good thing that came out of that marriage, was their daughter.

Following the breakup with my (ex)fiance, I became re-engaged, but to a different woman. That woman n' I have been engaged for five years. But over those five years, the communication between my fiance n' I, has been slowly ebbing to practically nothing. This has become really hard for me emotionally.

A year ago, the woman I met online, had started dating a guy that lived more local to her.

Recently, I started communicating with her again. When I put Yahoo Messenger on my new computer, she wondered why I hadn't talked to her in so long and she accused me of avoiding her. Well, By this time, Yahoo had VOIP technology as part of Yahoo Messenger. Where people could call from their PC to another PC, without incurring heavy long-distance charges. Up until yesterday(it is 1:30am right now), we had been communicating almost daily, and were having a great joy doing it. She told me that, I caused her to have a tingly feeling in her body and gave her goose bumps. I was pleasantly surprised that I could do that. Because my (ex)wife and, my (ex)fiance never reacted like that. The woman's breathing would start to sound like she was hyperventilating, or at least breathing hard. This is also something my (ex)wife and (ex)fiance never did.

I enjoyed that she reacted to me the way she was. I was being every bit the gentleman towards her.

The one problem that I never mentioned to her was, that she would accuse me of abandoning her and not caring about her, if I had to go do something. Yet she was also accusing her boyfriend of the same thing. She kept saying how lonely she was, and that her family didn't care about her. I could never figure out the root of why she would say those things. But that her mood seem to be changing with regularity. At a certain time of day, she would be angry at her family. At a certain time of day, she would be angry at me n' her boyfriend. Then at certain times, she n' I would get intimate on the phone.

I am just at a loss for all her hostility towards me.

Any feedback would be appreciated.