Saw this on tuesday night http://crossfire503.tumblr.com/post/...nal-reactivity
Emotional Reactivity
[One of the most common pieces of pop-pseudo psychology is “Don’t react, respond.” Usually, this is used by people advising someone who is upset about something horrible, but no one ever helps people define reactions, define responses, and learn to control which is used.
Reactions are instant, based on the brain’s neural networks, and are characterized by strong emotion. Emotional reactivity is the tendency to react to all situations with a strong emotional response. Unfortunately, reactive responses often elicit reactions from others, thereby eliciting further reactions in a vicious cycle. Emotional reactivity is actually linked to increased pain in fibromyalgia, difficulty sleeping, and heightened emotional states over long periods of time. The latter is often a predictor of major mood disorders such as Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) and Bipolar Disorder (BD), as well as influencing and exacerbating anxiety. Emotional reactivity is also found to influence personality disorders, notably Borderline Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Dependent Personality Disorder.
Responses are measured, thought out, and provoke discussion and the generation of solutions. This is not to discount the importance of emotions or their impact as a driving force, but to note that reactions involve acting based on the initial feeling as compared to thinking about the situation and using the emotional stimulus to push toward finding a solution.
The key in working with emotional reactivity is becoming aware of internal changes, both physical and emotional. Strong emotional reactivity is often characterized by feeling out of control and studies have found a relative disconnect between expressed emotion and demonstrate focus on anxiety-producing stimuli]

There is a book called "Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman" that explains it all in depth that i found fascinating. Not trying to promote or advertise book.