I did this to myself.. I'm 32, female.. I'm so embarrassed and ashamed. My dad is disappointed and worried. Why can't i hold it together? Why do I get so blinded by rage? I am a train wreck.

Cant play guitar or ride my bike, only 2 things that helped ease the pain of this crushing depression, for 6 weeks. Then physical therapy.

Feels like forever.

Just want to stay in my room, close my door, not see anyone.. sleep.. hibernate.

I feel so defeated.