That's ridiculous, not talking to you first about having your step daughter over. It's disrespectful. I suggest, if he does it again, tell him to cancel it, and if he won't, don't be there when the visitor comes. Just get out of the house, at least for most of the day. I'm not saying you should be kept from your own home, but let him deal with visitors he invites without your input.

This is off-topic, but I'm going to say it: There's too much male-bashing on these forums. Many times, when someone has problems with her husband or boyfriend, it breaks down into negative blanket comments about men. Not all men are the same, and not all women are perfect. Some women have the same faults you characterize men with. I'm not saying it hasn't happened, but I haven't seen any men posting female-bashing threads. I've seen several threads where male-bashing and stereotyping goes on. You may really believe what you say, but if you look beyond males, you'll see that it's not just men that have the faults you describe, and again, not all men. And if you bashed blacks, Jews, teachers, the mentally ill, or any other group, it probably wouldn't be tolerated.