Hi everyone,

Well, Mom finally got her biopsy and I'm horrified to say, it's cancer. The doc removed a tumor so large it had to be held with both hands. It had grown from the womb downward, and even though the tumor's been removed, the cancer has spread to the walls of the vagina and can only be treated with aggressive radiation & chemo. The doc says it's either Stage II B or Stage III--and God, how that scares me.

Next month she starts the cancer treatments. I can't help but remember how she went to her regular doc complaining of bleeding and ovarian pain, and how he told her that "It's nothing to worry about." He wouldn't even give her a referral to see a gyno. The onocologist said the cancer has been there for a long time--and he actually had the nerve to try to scold my mom for not seeking treatment sooner! I chewed him a new one, I was so mad--Mom's insurance won't pay for gyno visits unless she gets a referral from her regular doc, and the gynos in my area usually won't even see you without a referral. None of this is her fault and I made damn sure that onocologist understood that before we left. I swear, if anything happens to my mother, I'll have that stupid GP's head on a platter, I swear it.

Anyway, the onocologist took a picture of the inside of Mom's vagina. The tissue should look like the inside of your cheek--but this is how her's looks:



I just want her to be okay. I would give anything, ANYTHING for her to be well. I love her so much. She had me cut her hair yesterday in preperation for the chemo--her hair was long and silver and beautiful. But her new haircut is cute, too. I decided to shave all of my hair off as well, so she wouldn't have to be bald alone. I don't mind--it's only hair. My hair grows quickly anyway, so it's no big deal. I've also promised her a nice wig for her birthday next month. I hope she finds one she likes. Oh, and the kittens are doing well so far. The eyeless kitten (whom I've dubbed "Nell") sockets are infected--no surprise, considering her upper resp--so I'm taking her back to the vet today for a checkup. The other kitten is lively and will be returning home from surgery soon.

This is my mom, by the way. Post haircut.



Please keep the prayers and good thoughts coming. Thank you all so much for your kind words and support. You all are so wonderful, I cannot even begin to express my gratitude. Never doubt how beautiful and special you all are.

Hugs,

Alexiel