((Alex)),

You have had a lot to try to deal with so far in your life, and you have not had very much life experience where you know how to deal with all of this either. And that's ok, you will be learning with time and it does take time to heal and grow past things and even hold off until you can understand better.

As far as your mother is concerned, well we all think our parents are just supposed to know what to do when bad things happen. But Alex they are just human and things can happen where they don't have the life skills to deal either right away. I think your mother is very overwhelmed by all that has happened to her. And like you, she too doesn't want to feel it all either. We hurt when we lose someone we love and for a while we don't want to love anyone so we don't get hurt even.

But as they say, "time heals all wounds" and I would have to agree with that saying.

I am so sorry Alex that you have experienced all of this and I am sure that you feel lost right now. Do you know where to go and what you want yet? Probably not, and I can relate to that Alex, I have gone through some bad things too and I am not sure what I want right now other than to focus on learning to slowly heal. It is normal Alex to feel lost and even alone. But you are not alone because we all experience loss in our lives, it is a part of life we have to learn how to work through. And it is never easy for anyone. But we also have to remember that this loss is not ALL of life, good things can come too.

I try to think about what I can learn and also how I can take what I do learn and share that with others.

We can either allow our loss to continue to take from us, or we can use our loss to inspire us. Some very good people that have roamed our earth have left many insiring messages and knowledge for all of us to think about and learn from because they chose to be inspired by the losses they had in their lives.

Maybe you might end up being a psychologist or work with children that are where you are now someday. Because Alex, you are not alone in what you experience in both a loss as well as being exposed to abuse. You are young enough to learn to rise above all of this and you can help others do the same.

Hey, even something like this PC, well someone thought of this, and took steps to make it happen because they saw a void that needed filling somehow. And because they took that step, you can come here with your lost heart and I can talk to you like this so you don't feel so alone.

We can choose to give up when there is a void, or we can choose to see what WE can do or even learn to do to help fill that void.

((((Healing Hugs for you Alex)))
Open Eyes