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Originally Posted by ListenMoreTalkLess
I wanted to share one more thing. This was on my mind last night and I asked my wife, "is it okay that I am still in therapy?" It's been about a year in this round, and she knows that I had about 5 years before we met, and then about a year and a half into our relationship. She said back to me very gently, "Given what you went through in your childhood, I think that you need to take whatever time you need to heal in the way that you need to. You can go forever if that's what you need."
Or something like that. I was kind of teary eyed after "childhood", so I might have missed some words.
However, I am NOT going to therapy forever. I think I'll wrap it up within 6 months to a year.
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(((ListenMore))) your post brought tears to my eyes. You are so lucky to be married to someone who is supportive of your healing.
I am married to an engineer who doesn't do emotions really well
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah
Do you not feel empowered with your husband? What did he say that was hurtful? (If you don't mind sharing?)
His worry about money sounds like his anxiety talking?
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My husband does have anxiety and the money thing is definitely his anxiety talking. I have felt empowered with my husband at times but not when it comes to asking for what I want..... i'll explain more below...
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Right before the appointment he asked if he should stay home and if I should ask the question he wanted an answer to. I told him he should go to the appointment as I don't know how else to answer his question about 'how long' other than I don't know.
During the appointment my husband pretty much talked the entire time and my T had to stop him a couple times and said ok now stop and let her answer that question.
I'm a bit pissed that he took up 50 out of the 60 minutes --- blah, blah, blah, blah, blah because he's feeling anxious.
My T was very supportive of me during the conversation and limited what she said in terms of details but this is what she did say to my husband:
" I have received training from PTSD specialists and what to expect is 7 - 14 years of therapy and that geez doesn't have typical PTSD but complex PTSD. Because geez has had/put in 3+ years of therapy that does count."
My husband is OK with that and he gets it but it's sad that he couldn't 'get it' with my explanation. He had to go to my therapist before he could feel ok with it. He also said that he thinks that "I like therapy". She assured him that she tells clients if she feels their issues have been addressed and they don't need therapy anymore.
After my husband left I had 10 minutes to process a little of what I was feeling about it all...
In a nut shell I feel like I have to defend myself anytime I want something. That's a tough pill to swallow. I guess I did learn something about myself even if it was only in the last 10 minutes.
I am pissed that I couldn't talk about what I had already planned on talking about because my husband was having his anxiety 'attack' about my therapy. I feel like my appt went to alleviating his worries. GRRRRR!!!!
Post more later.....