You will find help here simon..

I am sorry to hear of such hatard towards a family member but I can realte in many ways.. I still can not trust my brother after what he did to me when i was younger..

It hurts to have to see his face when I go down to my mom's and I have never told my parents and most likely never will..
as I am ashamed of what he did to me.. It has taken me many years to get over my fear of men, in general..

The support you so desperatly need is here on this site.. Lots of ppl here have been trhough some of the same things you are talking about.

I for one fully understand you, and where you are comign from.

Lady D