I am sure the transition from inpatient to home is going to take some adjustment. I would like to point out that you stated you feel the "same" but no longer suicidal and are crying less. Hmmmm....sounds like you are doing alot better. They may seem like small things but they are major. You are home, your kids have the security of having a parent that doesn't want to remove themselves from this Earth and probably seems more cheerful to them.. Sure there is more work to be done but to me it sounds like you have done some great things. Good luck to you. Take care.