Thank you pbutton and shezbut. I went to the pdoc yesterday. She didnt give me meds at all and dismissed me as a patient. Since they believe my primary mental health issue is DID and meds dont help, therapy is all im getting. I guess its for the best, let me get through this on my own i guess. But t says things will get much harder in therapy soon, once we start digging into the abuse.theres a lot of thimgs i dont remember and i have w very sharp memory. But ive always thought, if i didnt remember then it didnt happen. This year had provided the most anxiety ive had in ages, and i was mostly unmedicated, i guess i can continue.
my sleep is terrible, i have a lot of abusive dreams at least 4 nights a week, so much that they dont scare me too much anymore unless they are extreme but they always leave me feeling really uncomfortable after i wake up. The docs dont want me on sleeping meds, say they dont want me to rely on them for the rest of my life.
Im going at it alone, im worried but perhaps its for the best