I can't seem to stop spending - handbags and books, clothes.... I don't ask, I just buy and then I'm depressed and afraid of what my husband will say!! He tells me to stop. PayPal has become my best and worst friend!!
I'm in a deep depression right now and so afraid I'm oing to have a weak moment and hurt myself.... I'm home alone most of the time. I have agoraphobia. Afraid to leave the house, afraid of people, family, I can't answer thephone unless it's my husband or sons, and I don't answer the door!! My life is spent in the living room on the PC and in front of the TV. I've gained a lot of weight. I can go out with my husband only. I can even ride the motorcycle with him, I don't think people can really see me as I'm behind him! It's the only enjoyment in my life right now. Other then my two precious dogs!! They are puppy pad trained. My husband and I take them out in the evenings to play in out huge back ard - they mind him, not me.
I have this desire to go home.... Eternal peace is what I seek.... But I won't willingly hurt myself, I pray! I've tried before, I was so overwhelmed with depression, the pain was so great, I couldn't go on!! I'm almost there again!!
I'm afraid my p-doc will hospitalize me.... I just couldn't go!!! Please pray for me!!