i need help someone! iv been feelings like a total screw up for the past couple years now and its getting so bad im kind of confused on what i feel anymore. im going blank i dont trust anyone because everyone hurts me. even my own parents m parents got divorced about 2 years ago and ever since hen, my dad has been totally mean to me! he says im a ***** and druggy and wont go anywhere in life and what not. i just had my 16th birthday last month and he didnt even call me on my birthday or give me a card my mom always says how shes dissapointed in me. how she never did any of the stuff i do when she was a kid. same with my big sister. i told my mom i had sex with my bf and now my sister hates me for not telling her. everything i do is always wrong i get honoral and try so hard in school and take college classes in highschool but its not good enough i do stupid things and love smoking and drinking and caant stop. it gets my mind off things and im not too worried about it bcz i get good grades. i wish i wasnt a disgrace to my parents! i also want to cry when im home alone. i hear things and i have this feeling of a presence that is coming to kill me. it happens at night too even while my parents ar here iv felt this same precense for years. i also black out alottttt and idk why. i have so many issues and i just want them to go away!