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Jul 07, 2012, 08:35 AM
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,289
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Quote:
Originally Posted by geez
 people who treat every interaction as a WIN or LOSE proposition
Wow that really hit me between the eyes! Thank you but ouch! That sums up so many relationships I've had or have!!!!
WOW! |
Yes, but this is very human too. And not only that but it is built into cartoons, movies, advertising, literature, politics etc. And we start absorbing this message when the TV goes on when we are very small and we watch cartoons that have a message revolving around win or lose. Think about fairytails that are read to us when we are small, there is always that underlying message about the potential of losing or getting hurt and needing to win and just know to run, hide, and be smart.
Healthy human relationships is hard to come by. And when we work through our past and how this win and lose took place in our childhood atmosphere, we have to learn how to understand that it is not just "us" that struggles with this.
When we open up our past and how it effected our own pshychie to a point where we struggle with cPTSD, we begin to see many people as bad monsters. And there can be many times where we can get triggered because some kind of interaction we experience or read about can remind us of a time when we truely struggled and had no real "rescuer" or "validation". It really takes time to be able to look back and get to a point where we actually learn how to better understand human nature and learn about the ways that it has effected us.
The constant important thing to understand about dealing with a troubled childhood is to make sure that you understand that the child that you were did not have the life skills that you have now. So "guilt" should not be something you constantly focus on.
The goal in therapy and working through PTSD is to work on developing the skills to not only just see "the win or lose" built into humanity. It is to learn how to be able to accept that it is there and how we can develope skills to not constantly be triggered by that emotionally. To learn how to move forward in a much more postive way inspite of the reality of being human.
Open Eyes
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