reading about your date, I started having flashbacks to a date I had in the early 80's, also in california, a big good-looking guy, but SO BOOOOORING - to where your eyes start rolling back in your head? ugh! and what kind of shrink categorizes actions as "stupid girl stuff"? See, you SWALLOWED that. I would have too. We don't want to believe the person is talking to us like that, but. they. are. I can see my (one) ex girlfriend (yes that's what I mean) throwing a drink in his face for saying that and cussing him out. My first thought on reading it was, "what a weird shrink, my T would never say anything like that." but I hope I would have walked away. you did, essentially, by not inviting him up - you are still protecting yourself with physical barriers, as am I - i'm not EXACTLY a hoarder, i'm just keeping the wolves out... I hope I am not coming off as know-it-all, I really see you as a sister, idk, we just have so much in common. I was a big walker (i l0ve race-walking), and I do l0ve your independent thinking. but T is softening me.