Well, i thought i'd post here instead of starting another thread.

I think another thing that gets me so down is seeing the kinds of lives people around me are living, and realizing that compared to them, I am socially inept and have a LOT of catching up to do. I have no idea how to meet new people, opening up or being able to let my guard down. The only reason I can converese so freely over the internet is because of the anonimity; no one here knows who I am, and it's very unlikely that I will ever be able to meet anyone from here.

You know, up until a few days ago, I for the life of me could not comprehend why some people would willingly cut themselves....but now I think I know why, especially since i've already done so a few times. After, I feel stupid for allowing myself to have been so weak. But the strange thing is, as low as I can feel sometimes, there are times when I feel, for lack of a better word, invincible. There are times when I feel great, like there's nothing out there that could possibly stop me. And on top of that, I have this constant feeling of some sort of pressure. I've never been one to express my anger, i always repress it, but there are times when I feel like I could blow at any minute and fly into a blind rage. Could I be bipolar???