I think she is looking for affirmation of your love and respect. If you can in earnest tell her that you love her unconditionally and admire the woman that she is today. Decisions she made in the past had a negative effect on you as a child, however, that doesn't change the fact that you love her. Re-hashing the details of these decisions will not serve any purpose at this time the point you are trying to make is that you love her and will always lover her unconditionally. Intro into the present by telling her that as a busy mom yourself you can not spend hours on the phone. Tell her you keep telling your girlfriends that and they are finally getting the message. You are so grateful because you didn't want to lose friendships but you absolutely hate talking on the phone. End with "Mom, I am so blessed to have you to talk to but I am so out of time", I love you and call if you need me but text if you just want to chat.

I think once she has confirmed that you love her in spite of the decisions she made in the past she will quit calling so much anyway. i have a busy 30 year old daughter and sometimes I really want to hear her voice but have learned to text first to see if she has time to talk. She has learned its ok to text me back with "no time to talk, will call when I can luv u". k