Hi John or not John! Wish I could help but haven't figured out my own self yet. It is sometimes like watching someone else live my life while I am curled up in the back somewhere, disconnected but recording. Mine are active after trauma for the most part. It can be sudden severe trauma, in which case the little girl wakes up and takes over for me when I shut down. Or it can be chronic lower level abuse and eventually the anger personality shuts me down and takes over. We are all different and no one here can diagnose you, but we can share who we are if we are willing. Only a professional could make a diagnosis.