Thank you both for your replies! Atleast I'm not alone.
That could be, I do have a HARD time not being in control. I'm a big control freak. I'll be the first to admitt it. I did have an abusive childhood- a little physical but A LOT of emotional. I just never thought that this could link with anything like that....hmmm.

It's just the littlest thing that sounds even remotely legal flips me out, and I go into panic mode. It's pretty miserable.