I'm just learning about bipolar. I'm not bipolar. But maybe that means I can answer your question well. I just broke up with my boyfriend who is bipolar and am just coming to terms with his illness and wondering if I would ever take him back.

Reading your story is heartbreaking and you sound completley remorseful and confused about your own behavior. It really sounds like you snapped out of something.

For someone who is not bipolar, just reading your story makes it all seem more 'real'

If I were your family member and I read what you wrote I would believe you and want to help you. My suggestion would be to print what you have written, or email your friends or loved ones the link (people you trust only) and let them see this. I think your honesty and candor now is probably the best way to let people know you want to make amends.

It can be very hard for outsiders to understand all of this. Your post makes it understandable on some level.