I think you should see what happens and try to set aside analyzing yourself/him too much. We can't always rely on just chemistry because we often pick the same type of partner and its not always the right kind. For example some women like the rebel /bad boy type that stirs that chemistry....but that's usually not a wise choice. There's also way more things to consider in a partner besides chemistry, especially when we're getting up in age. Like you said - you're not sure if its because you ignored the signs, because he was with your friend before. As long as you protect yourself from hurt, I think you should be open to living in the moment with this man. If he has wonderful qualities, maybe chemistry will follow.

If I were to get divorced and ever consider a relationship again - I would look for compatibility and kindness first. He sounds like a nice man seeker1950.