Yes, well, the last man with whom I was involved, the Psych.Ph.D...the chemistry was rampant. That ended with me here...seeking help and advice and many years of recovery. After that, I vowed NEVER to allow myself to become involved again. Really...truly, I practiced a form of self-hypnosis never to allow myself ever to be vulnerable again, and also to abhor intimacy with a man. That, I did.

Since then, I've formed a life alone, which is comfortable. I don't even acknowledge that I may be lonely. If I am to form any kind of relationship with this man, it will take baby steps. I have not tried to meet any men, because they would be impatient with me, re/the intimacy factor. When I ponder that, I feel revulsion...I really do! That is all part of the self-programming I have done to protect myself.

Big tub of worms, I know!