Joining a group I never thought I would have to and it took a very long time to.

About me..
I have been suffering what I think is stress induced severe depression and have been for about 8 years. It started some 12 years ago when I began to work from home (professional with office in the basement) and taking care of three kids. The stress began, but it eventually took a toll. Ridiculous anger, focusing on unimportant detail, not enjoying life, and beating myself up. Working from home meant only my family knew how bad it was.

Prior to all of this I was described as the person that people gather around because something good always happened if I was there. These days, I can't get myself out the door.

I am now separated, the soon-to-be-ex doesn't believe I have ever suffered form depression and I am making it all up. Her outlook has impacted my ability to get professional help, as I spent way too much time and energy on trying to help her understand. She couldn't see past the behaviors, and would rather judge than understand. She spent a lot of time telling just how everything she doesn't like in her life is my fault. We were together over 30 years, her opinion mattered.

I have finally figured out that what she thinks is completely unimportant, I do wish she would stop verbally beating me to make herself feel better.

We have have 50/50 custody of 3 teens. Communication is required. It can go from amicable to downright vulgar. The kids are doing okay, not surprisingly the middle son is having a hard time.

I did try some meds, but found that sleeping 20 hours a day was worse than suffering 24.

I am bright, well educated, normally very hard working, value family, loyalty, ethics & integrity, and the only one of the three male siblings that isn't addicted to alcohol or cocaine. (It was a rough childhood (alcohol, incest, physical abuse). I left home at 16, finished high school and 8 years later went to university, fished a masters, and became a CEO - while working from home. It took tenacity, I just don't seem to have anymore. These days it's an accomplishment if I get the dishes done. Being the best Dad I can be has kept me alive.

I haven't worked for 3 years and might just now be employable.

My Sanity test put me with severe depression.

On the good news side, I finally made an appointment with a psychiatrist and go Monday. And of course, I joined this group.